The PBI Legacy
Eric Horowitz - There is always a moment in life when you first think about your legacy. For Lawrence Schiffman, it was in the days after the publication of “From Text to Tradition: A History of Second Temple and Rabbinic Judaism.” For AIPAC executive director Howard Kohr, it was during that difficult summer as an unemployed college graduate before his love of Israel earned him a job as an AIPAC development associate.
With 14 memorable games in the books and a 15th fast approaching, it’s now time for the PBI to begin thinking about its legacy. Despite the game's storied history, leaving an indelible mark on JDS heritage is never a forgone conclusion. So let’s ask the question. Where does the PBI rank among JDS traditions?
After a series of thorough interviews with teachers, alumni, board members, and Eric Cantor, I feel confident in presenting the following rankings.
With 14 memorable games in the books and a 15th fast approaching, it’s now time for the PBI to begin thinking about its legacy. Despite the game's storied history, leaving an indelible mark on JDS heritage is never a forgone conclusion. So let’s ask the question. Where does the PBI rank among JDS traditions?
After a series of thorough interviews with teachers, alumni, board members, and Eric Cantor, I feel confident in presenting the following rankings.
5. Maximizing the number of Hebrew buzzphrases in the school’s mission statement
The mission statement currently features eight of them: Torah L’shmah, Ahavat Torah, K’dushah, Ahavat Yisrael, V’ahavta L’rayaka, Tikun Olam, B’tzelem Elokim, and Derekh Eretz. It's worth noting that B’tzelem Elokim and Derek Eretz were only good enough to make it as sub-principles while the first six on the list stand on their own. Personally I think Derekh Eretz is stronger mission statement material than K'dushah. Seems like there should be a parent committee to investigate this.
It’s also disappointing that the school couldn't get the number of buzzwords up to 18, thereby depriving seventh graders of the opportunity to taunt their counterparts at the Hebrew Academy about it.
The mission statement currently features eight of them: Torah L’shmah, Ahavat Torah, K’dushah, Ahavat Yisrael, V’ahavta L’rayaka, Tikun Olam, B’tzelem Elokim, and Derekh Eretz. It's worth noting that B’tzelem Elokim and Derek Eretz were only good enough to make it as sub-principles while the first six on the list stand on their own. Personally I think Derekh Eretz is stronger mission statement material than K'dushah. Seems like there should be a parent committee to investigate this.
It’s also disappointing that the school couldn't get the number of buzzwords up to 18, thereby depriving seventh graders of the opportunity to taunt their counterparts at the Hebrew Academy about it.
4. Annual inflation + 3% tuition hike
My FOIL request to the Rockville city government for additional financial documents is caught up in some red tape, so the number is a rough guestimate. A few years ago this tradition may have ranked higher, but it’s losing importance because it’s no longer an adequate means of ensuring the desired distribution of college enrollment outcomes. For example, in addition to having the means to pay JDS tuition, starting next year all kindergarten applicants must submit a detailed plan for how they will pay ivy league tuition in 2026.
My FOIL request to the Rockville city government for additional financial documents is caught up in some red tape, so the number is a rough guestimate. A few years ago this tradition may have ranked higher, but it’s losing importance because it’s no longer an adequate means of ensuring the desired distribution of college enrollment outcomes. For example, in addition to having the means to pay JDS tuition, starting next year all kindergarten applicants must submit a detailed plan for how they will pay ivy league tuition in 2026.
3. The controversies section on the JDS Wikipedia page
I admit this a reach based more on potential than performance, but the section is already full of two properly sourced recaps and who knows what sordid tales might fill the section in the coming years? Perhaps JDS will be involved in Montgomery County’s first transsexual bar/t Mitzvah. Perhaps the school will create a stir with the amount of Chol Ha’Moed homework it allows to be assigned. It’s shame we didn’t have Wikipedia for most of the last 20 years, but at least the controversy section has a bright future.
2. The PBI
When Mr. Blank started the PBI 15 years ago to improve his chances of befriending the top Jewish vocalists in the area nobody could have envisioned how far it would come. At this point there’s not much more to say that hasn’t been said. If there had been a PBI controversy big enough to make the Wikipedia page, it would likely take the top spot. Even without a controversy, the only reason the PBI doesn’t rank #1 is that it owes a lot of its success to the larger tradition that tops the list.
1. Strong bonds
What? I had to make one of them something nice. Also, highlighting the vague idea of people staying connected allows me to pay homage to the 8th greatest JDS tradition – “Ending an assignment with a half-assed copout.”
The bottom line is that JDS people like each other for some reason. They tend to do a good job staying in touch. Sure, it could be because the odd social mores they learned at JDS were maladaptive and forced them to develop psychological defense mechanisms that prevent them from befriending others. But maybe not.
I admit this a reach based more on potential than performance, but the section is already full of two properly sourced recaps and who knows what sordid tales might fill the section in the coming years? Perhaps JDS will be involved in Montgomery County’s first transsexual bar/t Mitzvah. Perhaps the school will create a stir with the amount of Chol Ha’Moed homework it allows to be assigned. It’s shame we didn’t have Wikipedia for most of the last 20 years, but at least the controversy section has a bright future.
2. The PBI
When Mr. Blank started the PBI 15 years ago to improve his chances of befriending the top Jewish vocalists in the area nobody could have envisioned how far it would come. At this point there’s not much more to say that hasn’t been said. If there had been a PBI controversy big enough to make the Wikipedia page, it would likely take the top spot. Even without a controversy, the only reason the PBI doesn’t rank #1 is that it owes a lot of its success to the larger tradition that tops the list.
1. Strong bonds
What? I had to make one of them something nice. Also, highlighting the vague idea of people staying connected allows me to pay homage to the 8th greatest JDS tradition – “Ending an assignment with a half-assed copout.”
The bottom line is that JDS people like each other for some reason. They tend to do a good job staying in touch. Sure, it could be because the odd social mores they learned at JDS were maladaptive and forced them to develop psychological defense mechanisms that prevent them from befriending others. But maybe not.
